5 Amazing Things Dads Do for Their Kids
By: KJ Bennett, Therapist for Parents
Inspired by the research of Dr. Anna Machin, author of The Life of Dad
As a therapist for parents, I have the privilege of working closely with dads as they navigate the emotional terrain of raising children — and I get to witness, firsthand, just how powerful a father’s role can be in a child’s life.
I was excited when I came across Dr. Anna Machin’s book The Life of Dad. Her research is groundbreaking and offers deep, evidence-based insight into the unique ways fathers support the emotional and psychological development of their children. Dr. Machin’s background as an anthropologist gives her work a refreshingly different lens than a psychologist’s—she highlights what fatherhood means across cultures and history, rather than focusing solely on how it functions in individual minds.
Whether you're a dad yourself or co-parenting with one, I’ve pulled together five ways that dads shape the lives of their children. Of course, there are many more — but I hope these five resonate with you.
1. Dads Build Emotional Resilience
One of the most important gifts a father can offer is resilience. Through rough-and-tumble play, healthy risk-taking, and encouraging kids to try (and sometimes fail), dads create a safe space for children to build emotional strength.
Dr. Machin writes, “Fathers are key to emotional resilience — teaching children to face risk, recover from failure, and grow stronger.”
In therapy, I often help parents recognize how essential this kind of emotional "training ground" is. It’s not about pushing kids too far — it’s about listening to their no’s, challenging them gently, and allowing them to make mistakes in the presence of a safe, loving adult.
2. Dads Encourage Independence
Fathers often give their children the gift of space — the freedom to explore, solve problems, and stretch their wings. This fosters autonomy, confidence, and self-trust.
As Dr. Machin puts it: “A dad makes a unique contribution to his child’s life, helping to foster independence of mind and spirit.”
In my work with families, I often see how this dynamic can beautifully complement a partner who may be more risk-averse or more anxious about letting their child, say, walk down a grocery aisle alone. That contrast can actually create a really healthy balance.
3. Dads Are Wired for Love
Here’s something truly fascinating: becoming a father changes a man’s brain. Hormones shift. Empathy increases. A dad’s capacity for emotional connection grows.
“There are extraordinary physiological changes a man undergoes when he becomes a father,” explains Dr. Machin.
We often talk about the mother’s biological wiring for love — how her hormones change during pregnancy and birth. But it was amazing to read about the biological changes that happen for men too. This isn’t just a feel-good idea — it’s scientific fact. Fatherhood is deeply emotional and deeply bonded. Dads aren’t just playmates or protectors; they’re biologically wired to nurture, soothe, and connect.
4. Dads Shape Identity
Fathers help children understand who they are and where they come from. Through storytelling, shared traditions, and modeling values, dads play a key role in shaping a child’s sense of identity and self-worth.
“Dads help children see themselves in the world — emotionally, socially, and even genetically,” writes Dr. Machin.
This is especially important as children grow and begin to ask big questions — about their place in their family, their culture, or even within their peer group. A father’s presence can provide a powerful anchor in that process.
5. Dads Are Redefining Fatherhood
Today’s fathers are reshaping what it means to be “Dad.” The old-school stereotype of the distant disciplinarian or sole provider is fading fast. Modern fatherhood is emotionally present, involved, and responsive.
As Dr. Machin says: “Modern fatherhood throws out the clichés — it’s hands-on, heartfelt, and vital.”
In my work with couples and families, I see dads leaning into their roles with intention and love — whether it’s midnight feedings, attending therapy sessions, or having heartfelt chats with their kids. Even if it feels awkward at first, watching fathers show up with presence and care is truly a beautiful thing.
To the Dads — We See You
We see you raising strong, curious, independent, and emotionally healthy kids — thank you. Your role matters now more than ever. You’re not just shaping your child’s life — you’re helping to redefine fatherhood for generations to come.